advertisements, advertising, Business, General ramblings, India, Television, TV Sitcoms, YouTube

Replaying Old Ads and Songs

Ever since I wrote that post on Malgudi Days, I have not stopped thinking about Indian Television and the shows/advertisements/jingles that we used to watch in ’80s and early ’90s. If you’re away from India, like me, then it is likely that you miss these shows much more and can’t wait to catch a glimpse of these.

I’ve tried to collect some of them in this post-

1. Ek Titli Anek Titli (Thanks Bong’o’P’ondit)- An old song that talks about the strength of unity.

2. Mile Sur Mera Tumhara- The objective of the video was to instill a sense of pride and promote unity amongst Indians, highlighting the different linguistic communities and societies that live in India. Created in 1988 by Doordarshan. (From Wikipedia)

3. Humara Bajaj Ad- We hardly get to see such genuine, patriotic ads these days!

4. Doodh Doodh Doodh- It’s fresh. It’s pure. It’s co-operative Milk! Not so sure about that anymore. The proportion of water is definitely greater than milk. Lovely ad though. :)

5. Surf Lalitaji Commercial- Bhaaaisaab! Need I say more? :)

6. Jungle Book- Chaddi pehen ke Phool Khila Hai ;) Wasn’t he the hottest guy?

7. Mahabharat Opening Credits- Every Sunday morning, every single household in the country had this song blaring from their television sets..I’m dead sure.

P.S- I don’t mean to hurt the feelings of people belonging to other religious sects. It’s just a general recollection.

8. Cadbury India Ad (Kuch Khaas Hai)- Never seen a hotter batsman…seriously. :)

9. Yeh Joh Zindagi Hai- Beatiful Title Track sung by none other than Kishore Kumar and starring Shafi Inamdar, Swaroop Sampat, Rakesh Bedi and Satish Shah.

10. Orangie Orangie I love you Rasna!

11. Complan Commercial- The young stars in this ad are supposedly Shahid Kapoor and Ayesha Takia.

Famous punch line- I’m a Complan Girl! I’m a Complan Boy!

12. Old Liril Commercial (1975)- I’m surprised that they allowed a bikini clad woman to be aired in an ad in 1975. :|

13. Surabhi can be viewed at Youtube. (Thanks Ulag- for reminding me)

Some ads I couldn’t find-Does anyone have these video?

1. Bajaj Ad- Jab mein chota bachcha tha, badi shararat karta tha…meri chori pakdi jaati…tab roshan hota Bajaj.

2. Vicco Turmeric Nahi Cosmetic ..Vicco Turmeric Ayurvedic Cream.

3. Boost Ad (Kapil Dev)- Boost is the secret of MY energy…OUR energy!

4. Priya Tendulkar as Rajani. When I tried searching for this, I only found hits relevant to Rajnikanth and Sivaji. :(

5. Old Nirma Ad

Please feel free to add more to this list. I’ll edit this post accordingly. :)

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Books, Entertainment, General ramblings, India, literature, Movies, Television, Thoughts, TV Sitcoms

Remembering R.K. Narayan’s Malgudi Days

Does this picture invoke strong memories in you? Chances are that you were born in India in the ’70s or ’80s. As a kid, I use to eagerly wait for R. K Narayan’s Malgudi Days to be aired on Doordarshan. The half an hour long show was a treat to watch, because it used to help a six or seven year old imagine the lives of simple folks, living in a small, fictional town called Malgudi.

A couple of months back, I came to know that all of us can watch Malgudi Days for free at the Rajshri Website. Only people who can understand Hindi can watch these episodes though. There are no subtitles, unfortunately. Needless to say, I watched each and every episode, back to back, for a couple of days. My favorite episodes still remain the same-

1. A Hero- That talks about a young boy called Swami, who’s afraid of sleeping alone. But his parents are determined to make him more courageous. Little Swami makes them proud when he not only manages to sleep alone, but also catch the burglar who tries to steal from their house. In the process, he lands up on the front pages of the local newspaper and becomes a hero.

2. Leela’s friend- Leela is filled with joy when she finds a playmate in her new house keeper, Sidda. But events take a wrong turn when Leela loses her gold chain and this incident coincides with the mysterious disappearance of Sidda.

Each episode can be downloaded for a fee of $1.99. Alternatively, you can use many of the freely available tools to download the videos illegally (Disclaimer: Please do so at your own risk. I’m not encouraging it by any means). By the way, there are a number of old movies, including Abhimaan, Amar Akbar Anthony, Anupama etc. that can be viewed for free at the Rajshri Website. Lovers of Ekta Kapoor will also find older episodes of Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi and Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki.

How many of you have watched the Malgudi Days recently? Which is your favorite episode?

Edit: Introductory Video found on Youtube-

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China, Economics, Finance, General ramblings, India, Life, Thoughts

Another Post on the Dollar-Rupee Race

Enough talking about the advantages and disadvantages of getting a self-hosted blog. Let’s move on to some news that I’ve been reading recently!

One of the biggest questions these days is whether US will slip into recession. The Fed has been cutting rates since the last two months. This should help the economy in the sense that it will encourage more lending, which in turn will encourage investment, and hopefully, the economy will pick up in the long run. A weaker currency is good for US in a way because this will spike the export levels and might help reduce the ever-growing trade deficit.

Of course, we can’t forget the effect of a weak currency on the inflation (which will rise) and the energy costs. Right now, I’m paying $2.89 for a gallon, which is quite cheap compared to other parts of the country, where most of them are paying more than $3 per gallon.

There are lots of speculations and people are of the opinion that the dollar will depreciate even further and hit an all time low somewhere in the middle of 2008…and then the supply of dollar will (and already is) increase and the demand will (and already is) decreasing. The currency will finally reach a state of equilibrium sometime early 2009 and everything will be fine and dandy. There are some “upshots” about the weak dollar, like this article from Business Week mentions-

A weaker dollar also can help employment, as multinational companies choose to hire relatively cheaper workers in the U.S. Investors are also more likely to look for bargains in the relatively cheap U.S.

When we talk about the “relatively cheaper workers”, how can we not talk about the Indian Economy? ) My analysis closely aligns with Basab Pradhan’s thinking in this regard. Like he mentions, the industry that is “in the eye of the storm” is the Financial Services Industry and “most Indian services companies get 30 to 40% of their revenue from the Financial Services industry”. The second point he makes is that the stakes are much larger. Around $70 billion of losses have become public until now, and like Goldman Sachs predicts, the losses could cross $300 billion! Surely, India will get affected? There are very few companies that don’t have large off shore projects in India. So, how exactly can we say that India won’t be affected? A weaker dollar will erode the profit margin of these multinational companies. Anyone who has some knowledge of the method of translation costs can comprehend the effect. A company functions to add value to the share holders and indirectly to show good numbers in the financial statements. If that won’t happen, then shouldn’t the strategy change?

There is a report saying that Germany is already expecting a slower growth in 2008, thanks to the US subprime mortgage scene and the increase in the minimum wages. Victoria Ho, in her article “Asia Unhampered by Shaky U.S Economy” quotes Ravi Shankar Pandey, a senior market analyst-

“A substantial portion of Asian IT investments will be new investments and will come from organizations scaling up their IT systems or building entirely new ones to drive business.”

I don’t buy this statement. Who are these organizations who are scaling up their IT systems? I haven’t read anything of this sort in the previous weeks. If anyone has, then please feel free to write a comment and send me a link. I would be interested in exploring that angle.

While talking about the depreciating dollar and the appreciating rupee, we are making a big mistake when we focus only on the IT industry because “the tech companies spawned in Bangalore employ only 2 million. The textile and apparel industry employs 88 million, and its strength is key to India’s economy”. And these textile industries are not faring very good. If you are in the US, then I’m sure you’ve noticed how most of our clothes are produced in cheaper nations like India, Sri Lanka, Bangladesh, Haiti, and China. The appreciating rupee is not helping their business because the margins are getting cut, their goods are becoming more expensive. They are facing the hard choice of laying off workers. Most of them are courting private equity firms for infusion of capital.

So, whenever I read blog posts that say “India will not suffer” in various permutations and combinations, I can’t help but roll my eyes because most of us love analyzing situations in an uninformed manner, including me. I say that because I can’t rely on these media reports and neither can I rely on the inflated GDP figures of India. Who knows that the real GDP growth rate is. But you’re welcome to contest my views, perceptions and reflections in a civilized manner.

Blogging, Britney Spears, General ramblings, Life, Thoughts, TV Sitcoms, Wordpress

Bidding 2007 a Final Good Bye

The clock hands have definitely started running faster because I can’t believe the fact that 2007 is almost over. As I write this post, I can’t help but retrospect about all my accomplishments and failures in 2007, and hope for a better year ahead. This post is not supposed to be a nostalgic trip down my personal life. Instead, I plan to hand out some “awards” and mention other important events that are related to my blog. Winners- Sorry, I have no flashy badges to hand out. Just a link. :)

Total Hits till date, while I was writing this post- 276, 280

Total Comments-2,940. I don’t really believe this number because at least 25% of these comments are my replies.

Top Post of 2007- None other than Deathly Hallows-Lots of Leaks Surface. This post received 7,978 hits in a single day, thanks to the Harry Potter mania.

Top Search Engine Term- No, it’s not Harry Potter or any other permutation combination. It’s “Taj Mahal”, “Jesus Statue in Brazil”, and other words related to my post The New Seven Wonders of the World.

Most Enthusiastic Commenter- No guesses here! I have only one contender and that is Ish. :) In fact, it’s not just to do with my blog, Ish comments enthusiastically in the blogs of all his friends. He doesn’t look at the length of his comment and stops only after he’s done explaining his viewpoint. You need to read his comments to really know what I mean.

Top Blogging Topic- I have tried to blog about all sorts of things that interest me. But my categy widget tells me that there are the Top Three Categories-

  1. Movies (obviously)
  2. Technology
  3. J.K Rowling (Of course!)

Post with the most number of inflammatory comments- After I wrote a post bashing J.K Rowling and the new book (in a very bad,abusive language), people started bombarding my comments section with all kinds of ludicrous comments. I had to close down the comments section for sometime. I’m not very happy with this post because on second thoughts, I shouldn’t have written such a childish post. But then again, it’s my blog and I write whatever I feel like. :P

Here’s an example-

I came across this page accidentally while searching for something on google. It was explicit very early on that there are several inconsistencies and innacuracies in what appears to be the pathetic rant of an illiterate moron.

The sole thing ‘hurting’ anyone’s ‘intelligence’ is the terrible phrasing and literary style of this utter piece of crap. To begin with, the phrase is ‘an insult to my intelligence’ but i shall refrain from being too pedantic and not comment further on your choice to use simpler, less grammatically correct, words.

Futhermore, you speak of various plot holes, yet your argument appears to lack substance as you fail to point out any of these and back up your point with any feasible evidence.

Ignoring your petty attempts at low rate sarcasm, i will move on. You criticise this woman’s writing, so go on, why don’t YOU write a novel then? Write a book, get it published and make it a multimillion pound bestseller. No, not some half-ass fan fiction which rips off her plots, your own. See if you get thousands of sleepy kids waiting in line for YOUR ‘epic’.

Your response to this will probably be ‘but i never said i was an author’. Well, neither did JK Rowling before THOUSANDS OF MILLIONS OF CHILDEREN, ADULTS AND TEENAGERS AROUND THE WORLD BOUGHT AND READ AND RAVED ABOUT HER PUBLISHED BOOK. But she tried, and clearly succeeded. Your opinion is irrelevant.

You know WHY it’s an epic? Of course you don’t, your IQ rivals that of an Amoeba (look it up). So i’ll explain. Because even though you didnt like it- you feel compelled to rant and talk about it. It’s THAT important to you. Surely if it’s worth you wasting your WISE words and evidently PRECIOUS time on (when you could be out getting a husband and starting your beautiful family) then it is an epic. Any publicity is good publicity. Secondly, have you heard of any other book which had an opening like this?! Probably not, most illiterates don’t know many book names. Alas, i pity you. But trust me, there hasn’t been. And if there has, not for a long long while. THIS MAKES IT AN EPIC.


Top Blog for Entertainment- Not many of you know about this blog called Profusion, but I love reading it to get all kinds of gossip news.

Top Blog on India and other current events- Nita, just because of the simple reason that I haven’t come across any other blogger who writes about India with such passion.

Top blog for movies and other reviews- There is a tie here-

1. Prestidigitator- He writes wonderful movie and book reviews. So, if you’re an avid movie fan or a book reader, then you really need to check out his blog.

2. Baphomet- Bap has an amazing style of writing, which is evident from his recent series of blog fiction. I promise you that you won’t be disappointed.

3. Canadian Cinephile- A very professional blog with very good reviews on movies, both new and old.

Cooky Award of the Year- Goes to Nikhil, for keeping hundreds of hard disk under his bed, for getting bored because he took ONLY 18 credit hours in Fall, for signing up for 30 credit hours in Spring 08, and for having the guts to laugh outrightly at a Professor and then getting thrown out and for sending me a free copy of his upcoming novel.

Top blog on Technology- Engtech, because I love all the tips and tools that he dishes out. My all time favorite is the WordPresss Ninja Comment tool.

Worst Blogs of 2007: Tie again!

1. I CAN HAS CHEEZBURGER? – - No seriously…what is so cute about those stupid cat pictures? Happy with the enormous success of this blawg, the authors have started another one on dogs- Loldogs ‘n’ Cute Puppy Pictures- which is definitely much better, because I love dogs.

2. Scobleizer- We need to stop labeling this guy as a Tech guru. The quality of his posts is declining exponentially. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of adding him as a friend on Facebook, and since that day, he hasn’t stopped irritating me with his stupid status and twitter updates.

Actually, there is another one that I came across recently- Dalit Nation- The Only Authentic Voice of the Dalits. The author takes pleasure in analyzing every main stream event (even the crowning of Aishwarya Rai as Miss World) from a caste-system-point-of-vew. He abuses anyone who doesn’t agree with his narrow view point. Such blogs that focus on the caste system need to be shut down.

Top Controversy- The Blogger OpenID thing, all thanks to some unexplained moves made by Blogger.

Best WordPress Theme for 2007: The Journalist Theme. I saw lots of blogs, including mine, implementing this neat, two column theme. Like the blog description mentions, it’s perfect for people who need lots of writing space.

Best Feature Introduced by WordPress in 2007: Integrated Blog Stats. I love the detailed, blog stats that are available on WordPress. The best thing is that it keeps getting better.

Top Blogging Tools for 2007- Windows Live Writer and everything Greasemonkey

Top Technological Innovation- Apple iPhone

Top Event- Everything Britney Spears and Rowling

Moment of the Year: Miss South Carolina 2007 talking absolute sh*t on National TV

Biggest Flop of the Year- Saawariya

Best TV Series- Heroes

Best Movie- Though not in 2007, I would give it to Tri Colors and The Double Life of Veronique by Kieslowski

Christmas, General ramblings, India, Santa Claus, Taj Mahal, Thoughts, YouTube

Track Santa

This website helps you track Santa Claus, as he delivers presents all over the world tonight. No, don’t laugh! Keep the faith!

There is a cool Google Map that shows the cities/towns where Santa’s already delivered the goodies.

Here is the video of Santa’s first sighting-

There is this video where Santa is shown flying over the Taj Mahal. Err…isn’t flying over the Taj Mahal prohibited? Maybe the Government makes an exception for Santa Claus. :|

For other videos, check out this page from Youtube.

There is a page that’s titled “Is He Real?”. According to the website, of course, he’s real. Another page tracks the number of cookies he’s already eaten. Want to know the number? It had crossed 1 billion the last time I checked. The counter gets updated every nano second. Not a very good message heath wise, eh?

Yes, I used to believe in this stuff as a kid too. Not anymore. If anyone were to ask me if it’s real, then I wouldn’t come up with such elaborate lies. At one particular place in the website, it’s written-

Long before the Wright brothers flew the first airplane or the Montgolfier brothers flew the first hot air balloon, Santa knew he had to find a way to travel quickly from house to house at great speed. We know from our Santa Cam images that Santa’s choice for quick transportation was a herd of flying reindeer. Of course, to this day, detailed information on these reindeer remains a mystery. We do know, however, that Santa somehow found a way to get the reindeer to help him with his worldwide mission of gift giving. A veil of sweet mystery hides the rest.

I can’t stop squirming in my chair. This website is probably getting a lot of hits. Whatever! Happy Holidays everyone.

P.S- Sorry for not replying to your comments. I’ll do that as soon as I can.

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Blogging, Entertainment, India, Life, Thoughts

Porn, anyone?

I’m sure all you guys who read my blog must have gotten very excited after seeing the blog post title. Sorry, I’m not giving away free memberships to any porn website.untitled.jpg

A couple of people landed here while searching for “moms f***ing” and “aunty lover”. :| When I ran a Google Search, all I could see were listings of porn sites, at least in the first ten pages. How desperate must they have been to go beyond the first ten pages or so to have actually landed up here! My blog is rated for “General Audiences”. Take a look at my About page.

Also, someone searched for Ranbir Kapoor’s phone number. Heh. Poor fan! No doughnuts for you. Sorry!

Edit: Came across another weird term ” THE RECEIVER REQUESTED A HOLD FOR A FUTU” (WTF?! what is a Futu?)

Have you come across any weird Search Engine Terms in your Blog Stats Page?

AIDS/HIV, General ramblings, HIV/AIDS, India, Life, Thoughts

World AIDS Day


Found this one from the Wake Up Pune Website:

Some daunting India HIV and AIDS statistics:

India has a population of one billion, around half of whom are adults in the sexually active age group. The first AIDS case in India was detected in 1986; since then HIV infection has been reported in all states and union territories.

The spread of HIV in India has been diverse, with much of India having a low rate of infection and the epidemic being most extreme in the southern half of the country and in the far north-east. The highest HIV prevalence rates are found in Maharashtra in the west; Andhra Pradesh and Karnataka in the south; and Manipur and Nagaland in the north-east.

  • Estimated number of people living with HIV/AIDS at the end of 2006 was between 2-3.1 million.
  • The 30-34 years age group has the highest % (0.54%) of HIV/AIDS affliction.
  • 124,995 people (Males- 88,245 Females- 36,750) were tested as HIV/AIDS positive at the end of August 2006.
  • In 85% of the cases, the virus is transmitted through sexual contact. Mother-to-child comes second at 4%.
  • Tamil Nadu has the highest number of HIV/AIDS cases, second comes Andhra Pradesh, whereas Maharashtra occupies the third spot.

Related Post:

HIV/AIDS tests to be made compulsory in Andhra Pradesh 

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    Business, China, Economics, General ramblings, George Bush, Life, Thoughts

    China to drop Some Trade Subsidies

    Today, U.S announced that China has agreed to-

    eliminate WTO-illegal tax breaks that encouraged Chinese companies to export more to the United States and other countries… Chinese had also agreed to scrap tax and tariff penalties that had penalized U.S. and other foreign countries in trying to sell their goods in China.

    If you remember, in March 2007, US had also imposed some import duty level of 10.9 to 20.35% on the value of coated paper imports from China. Some are of the opinion that all this is being done not to reduce the US trade deficit with China, but because of the mounting political pressure.

    This page tabulates the US China Trade Statistics and China’s World Trade Statistics. As you can see, the current US Trade Deficit balance is $232 billion. It’s been increasing by about $30 billion on an average since the past five years.

    One of my professors brought it to my notice that a town in Florida is considering banning Chinese made products. If the bill passes, then this will be the first town in the US to take such a step against Chinese goods. But there are some clauses. Not all kinds of goods will be banned.

    It only applies to Chinese-made products costing more than $50 or those in which more than 50 percent of parts are manufactured in China. In addition, the city may purchase a Chinese-made product if it is not available otherwise. Finally, if an alternative product, for example an American-made wheelbarrow or an Indian-made rain jacket, costs 150 percent or more of the cost of the Chinese-made product, the city can opt for the one made in China.

    As far as I know, supply chain management and the related manufacturing is a complex procedure. How exactly do we determine what exactly is meant by “50% of parts are manufactured in China”? There needs to be some sort of a barometer that would standardize the different component of each product that is imported! This would require lots of tax payers’ money. Is it even useful?

    Their line of reasoning is that banning such goods is necessary because of the loss of jobs manufacturing jobs in the US and China’s violation of important human rights, record levels of pollution etc. Will banning such goods bring back those manufacturing jobs back to the US? The logistics are much more complicated than this. Consumers will in almost all the cases go for goods that are cheaper, provided that the quality doesn’t suffer. Will US be able to produce goods of the same price and quality? Quality, yes…but price?Probably not. Labor costs in China are low due to a variety of reasons. One reason is that the labor regulations are not that strict. So small manufacturers get away with many illegal practices of hiring small children etc. It’s not the same in the US. Americans are paid overtime, benefits etc. The cost of living also plays a very big role here.

    If this move of globalization were to recede, then it would go against the law of comparative advantage, which states that

    “Individuals and nations gain by producing goods at relatively low costs and exchanging their outputs for different goods produced by others at relatively low cost. All potential trading partners can gain enormously through appropriate specialization and exchange.”

    This doesn’t mean that every company should go global. Even though production is cheaper in China, other costs such as inventory management, shipping and handling etc. do shoot up. Most of the times, companies end up having a higher inventory due to bad forecasting, or stocking out of date products when the industry demand changes unexpectedly. So, nothing comes without external and internal risks. The costs will increase dramatically if something were to go wrong in such a long supply chain. A risk benefit analysis needs to be done.

    Corporate America, particularly Walmart, is often blamed for this huge trade deficit. People believe that it is the greed of the organizations that is driving the economy down hill. The American CEOs are the highest paid in the entire world. There are huge accounting scandals here. There is no balance between the desires of the global corporation, the needs of the nation’s population, and world improvements in the standards of living.

    I actually agree with Lou Dobb’s point of view when he says that the government is too soft on the super corporations because of donations to the political parties and their elections. It is during times like these when the bottle neck gets too tight that the Government decides to do ‘something’ in order to ease the pressure and not because they are concerned of the national economy and the people. However, I don’t support most of his other views regarding immigration, anti-gun control measures etc.

    For me, the important question here is- Lower prices give customers more choices and improve their standard of living. The money that is saved is actually spent again in buying more goods. It might not translate into greater savings. If a country gets lower prices at the cost of a weakening economy, then is it worth it? Where should the Government draw the line? Can a line be drawn at all? (I’m not implying that this is what is happening in the US right now. In fact, the current situation in the US would be because of the sub prime mortgage crisis and a credit crunch in general.)

    If various theories of economics are to be believed, then globalization should help clear out the inequalities in labor wages between two nations. In fact, I’ve read lots of news reports recently that pointed to the increase in wages in China, India, Brazil etc. The labor wage in India is increasing at the rate of at least 20% per annum, if not more; in the US, it’s increasing only at the rate of about 2% every year. It will be interesting to see the effect of this wave maybe after a decade or two.

    Please feel free to share your thoughts. This post turned out to be much longer than what I intended it to be.

    Diwali, General ramblings, Life, Thoughts

    Happy Diwali

    “Come out into the universe of Light, Everything in the universe is yours; stretch out your arms and embrace it with love”

    - Swami Vivekananda

    I’m a little late doing a Diwali post compared to my other blog friends. So, Wish you all a Very Happy and Prosperous Diwali! :)

    I wish I could burst fire crackers and hear some noise. I miss the commotion and the general hustle bustle in India. A couple of days before Diwali, I would go to the firecrackers market with my father to purchase fireworks supply that would last me at least for four days. Here, the silence comes to haunt me, especially during Diwali. All of you who are still with your family should feel really lucky and appreciate it because it’s only when you move away from home do you realize the importance of being together on festivals.

    I have tried to make my house look a little festive by putting up (christmas) lights and burning candles. I will probably try to make some kind of sweet (probably Gulab Jamun because it’s very easy and can be made using the ready made Mix).
    Here’s a picture of some Gulab Jamun that I had cooked a couple of weeks back-

    haloween 048

    Not bad, eh? What do you say?

    Cartoons, Entertainment, Forwarded E-mails, General ramblings, Jokes / Funny Stuff, Life

    Santa Banta

    In an interview,
    Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
    Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ….
    Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
    Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup…

    Agent: What is your father’s name in english?
    Santa: Beautiful red underwear
    Agent: R u joking?
    Santa: No, my father’s name is Sunder Lal Chadda

    Napoleon: There is no such word as ‘Impossible’ in my dictionary.
    Santa: To dictionary dekh kar kharidni thi…! (So you should have seen and bought the dictionary!)

    Ek baar Santa Gangubai ke ghar jaata hai aur darwaza knock karta hai.
    Gangubai: Kaun ?
    Main !
    Gangubai: Main kaun?
    Santa: Tu Gangubai

    An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.
    Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
    Santa: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.

    Banta ped pe chada to upar baithey Bandar ne poocha: Upar kyon aaya?
    Banta: Apple khane.
    Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
    Banta: Pata hai, Apple saath laya hoon.

    Pappu while filling up a form: What should I write against mother
    Santa: Very long…..!

    Q: Why was Santa writing the exam near the door?
    A: Because it was an entrance exam.

    Nurse: Congrats Santa ji, aap papa ban gaye. (Congrats Santa ji, you’ve become a father)

    Santa: Meri wife ko nahi bolna mein use surprise dunga! (Don’t tell my wife…I’ll give her a surprise)

    Q: Why did Santa throw the butter out of the window?
    A: He wanted to see butterfly!

    A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa does not turns up for
    4 days.
    Lady calls again, Santa replies: I’m coming daily since 4 days, I press
    the bell but no one comes out.

    Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatoes 5 days ago, he
    hasn’t come back yet!
    Santa: Why don’t u cook something else

    Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye. (Such horrible marks? You deserve two slaps)
    Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha
    hai. (Yes father; let’s go! I even know the house of that stupid teacher!)

    While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a deep hole.
    Banta: Are you okay?
    Santa: Yeah!
    Banta: Did you break anything?
    Santa: No, there’s nothing down here

    Santa was riding on a horse. He jumped the red light & a cop whistles.
    Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: ‘Le Karle Number Note’ (Here…take down the number!)