Books, Deathly Hallows, General ramblings, Harry Potter, J.K Rowling, Thoughts

I Hate You, Rowling, I Really Do. Truly. Madly. Deeply.

** There are lots of profanities in this post. Please read it at your own discretion**

Thank you SO much for hurting my intelligence.

Rowling, I WANT TO PUNISH YOU!

I NEED YOU TO WRITE USING MY SPECIAL QUILL—-

I MUST NOT TELL LIES!

UNTIL YOUR HAND START BLEEDING. please stop questioning our intelligence by writing such hogwash and then acting as if you have written the BIGGEST EPIC in the history of literature!!!!

You tell us in the interview that Grindelwald is dead and then you bring him back alive? AND WHO THE FUCK IS THIS BARBAGE??!!! never heard of this teacher. I DIDN”T even feel sympathetic when she died. ACCIO HAGRID! ACCIO ROWLING!!! So that I can KILL HER!

UGGHHHHHHH.

I’m sorry, this post looks awful, but believe me, it still can’t do justice to how rotten I FEEL AND HOW MUCH I WAS SWEARING WHEN SHE WAS READING THAT BOOK. I felt like picking her up from that throne and dropping her on the ground with such force that she would never be able to get up, LET ALONE WRITE ANOTHER HARRY POTTER BOOK. I thought that OoTP is the Worst, BUT SHE has surpassed herself! WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHY THE FUCK does she have that smug expression on her face as if she has written an epic? Those poor kids were sleepy and pissed off. Nobody even smiled or acted shocked. Only when he gave that funny expression did they realize that she is done reading. I would have screamed in the middle “I MUST NOT TELL LIES”.

I HATE YOU JK ROWLING! I REALLY DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All you guys who liked the book- Congratulations!!! GOD BLESS YOU! I’m not ready to read any shit she dishes out here. And all those of you who want to tell me to stop ranting –

Give me back all those years that I spent on her fucking books.

I was going to buy that wooden box from Amazon with all the hardbacks in it. You know? Just to keep a neat copy to pass it down my family tree. It would become an antique heirloom kind of thing. It sounds corny, but I mean it. I have no kids now. damn, not even married. Only 23. But I was really serious.

All the fan fiction writers are better than her.

WE CAN ACTUALLY DO A BETTER JOB!! WE ARE BETTER EDITORS. WE RECOGNIZE ALL THE LOOP HOLES AND THEY DON’T
THAT LEVINE AND EVERYONE ELSE SHOULD GO DRINK WATER FROM THEIR POTS!

Instead of going to a midnight party here, I’ll probably go to a pub and drink away my sorrows.

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62 thoughts on “I Hate You, Rowling, I Really Do. Truly. Madly. Deeply.

  1. wow ruhi – once you pop you can’t stop I guess =). I thought you were thinking the leaked carpet book was a fake and had a veritable host of reasons why it was fake. Did you find out it’s the real thing?

  2. gswarriors says:

    i do wonder though. the leaked copy was 859 pages, yet it was announced as 874? so was there 16 pages of garbage?

  3. @Patrick, yeah…that’s how women are πŸ˜› When I started reading the carpet book, I thought that it’s brilliant. Towards the end, I didn’t feel so great about it. Since then, I have been in a denial mode that she couldn’t have written SUCH SHIT. Contradicting herself? Wow..that’s like a new precedent that she’s set. I listened to her live reading now, on Bloomsbury. You can too at http://bloomsbury.com. It’s been recorded. She read the first chapter and it’s word to word same as the carpet book. Many fans are still saying that the first chapter was the same in both the leaked versions, so it might be possible that the rest of the book is different. But I doubt it. 😦 Did you read the carpet book, btw?

    @gswarriors, The leaked copy was around 769 pages. Official page count is 784. I don’t what happened. … I have definitely gone mad.

  4. @carrot…AWw! 😦 I know how you feel…I am in the same state too. Did you get your personal copy of the carpet book? I’ll receive it tomorrow! Still night time here.

    Don’t forget to place your book against the carpet and click a pic. LOL. I just don’t know what to say….very lost and sad.

  5. If only….

    I got a very thourough summmary from some newspaper and it describes the dreaded carpet book. It is now like 2am EST so I am expecting summaries to pop up sson on blogs to confirm the dreaded inevitability that is true. I am still crossing my fingers the ending is fake….

    I still have mixed feelings, I will still buy the damn thing because I have a massive book collection and must complete the series… But I feel you, this was a very contradictory ending to everything she has said!

    Your comment was nice, but you deserve the credit! You have kept me up to date in my time of need, if nothing else I have at least gained a new net-friend :)out of this travesty JKR calls the ending!!!!

  6. @Marijayne, Well…the carpet book is the real book 😦 I’m not even thinking about it anymore…about 1:40 am CST. Pretty upset. I’ll probably sleep now and wait for my book tomorrow.

    You have kept me up to date in my time of need, if nothing else I have at least gained a new net-friend :)out of this travesty JKR calls the ending!!!!

    Great! I feel the same way too…it was great interacting with you πŸ™‚ I’ll make it a point to visit your blog. I have definitely gained lots of new blog friends because of this carpet book. So, yeah, all is not lost!

  7. Bleh, I was disappointed with the book as well but you went ahead and trashed the shit out of it and there’s only one word on my mind – Brilliant!

    Has Rowling gone bonkers? I read somewhere that she said she went to a hotel, drank alcohol and wrote the ending with a lot of crying. And that’s what we get?! That epilogue had such a bollywood-ish ending that I was convinced that the book is a big time fake. How can Harry be allowed to live happily ever after? And what’s the deal with Albus Severus?! That sounds seriously gay. And the day she thought about pairing Harry and Ginny, she had destroyed 1/3rd of the book. They’re so not meant for each other. Harry never even had the hots for her and all so suddenly they’re getting married and having kids with lame-ass headmaster names. That’s big big amounts of crap.

    But well, look at the positives, your blog got huge and mark my words-HUGE amount of hits. You surpassed me in like 10 days or something. That was eternal!

    Btw, where’s JK now?, I’m sending assassins.

  8. @ish, the only thing I have gained in the process is a couple of new blog friends…I’m so pissed off! Bullshit book. Don’t forget to watch her feed at bloomsbury website. she read the entire first chapter. It was like a big blow when I heard her reading that BS with a Miss-know-it-all kind of look. All the kids were literally sleeping or pissed off (the older ones). She really thinks that this is the BEST book in the series. Now I know her IQ Level, I swear. Her once chance to go down in the history has been spoiled and what hurts is that the media are still going gaga over her BS. They will royally ignore all criticisms by fans. They don’t care. It’s Harry Potter!

    Yeah, the blog hits are kinda cool πŸ˜› Never saw that coming…It’s in the top 10 since the past couple of days. Been getting about 18k hits/day on an average.LOL.

  9. sheryl says:

    I have read the book. Have it here with me. Take note, friends. The CARPET BOOK and JK ROWLING’S BOOK are a PERFECT MATCH.

    Yep, the leaked book is the real Deathly Hallows book, after all.

    He he… CHEERS!

  10. sheryl says:

    Oh and by the way, as for the pages issue, the American version has 759 pages. I dunno how long is the UK version. And one more thing, the last sentence is “All is well.”

    Really.

    πŸ™‚

  11. Sheryl, Yeah! πŸ™‚ I just got mine…same deal unfortunately. Carrotmadman, do you hear me??! SAME THING!

    Nits, the UK version is 608 pages (heard so). I have the US version.

  12. I already said this but, Next book by Rowling: An autobiography titled `How to destroy your best chance to go down in history in 7 easy steps`

    damn….. anyway, that will at least save me the pain of paying Rs 700 for a damned carpet book.

    To be honest, i started my own fanfic of HP7 a month or so after the release of HPHBP, but the file got lost and i didnt bother to start again because i thought Rowling would impress me with the real book. Now am really thinking of restart the fanfic project, just to see if i surpass her cause i already had a plan on the main events…..

    Anyway special thanks to Ruhi and my compatriot carrotmadman for rheir support, your optimism really helped πŸ˜€

  13. ah your complaint is half as clear as your profanities! what are you complaining about exactly? the ending? how else would you have liked it to end!

    i liked it, really did, its one of the most logical endings… nice idea about the family thing.. im 22 as well probably will follow your idea πŸ˜‰

  14. @kyu, Well probably you should start that fanfic and send a free copy to Rowling πŸ˜› She’ll know then!

    Thank you for visiting my blog. I, for one, had a nice time talking about Harry Potter…I’m re-reading the book again. Got my carpet book delivered today and clicked some pictures too. I’ll put them up shortly. When I read it for the first time, I really liked it. After some time, when the plot holes became more apparent, then I wasn’t so sure. Right now, I have gotten over my denial mode, and…just trying to absorb the beauty of it 😦 Dunno!

    @pallav, where do I start? Probably I’ll write a seperate post on it. But, tell me, did you truly like the name “Rosie” and “Hugo” and the greatest of all- Albus Severus? I’m a little appalled.

    im 22 as well probably will follow your idea πŸ˜‰

    Which idea? The amazon wooden box? I’m having doubts about it, like I said 😦

  15. Lee says:

    I was terribly disappointed with JKR’s last book. Not only did the plot bother me, and especially the way it ended, but Rowling’s sentences were so awkward at times that it was difficult, and painful, to read.

    I am just glad that I’m not the only one who agrees that this book was nothing exceptional.

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  17. @Lee, Her books have been going downhill since Book 5, but I thought that she would revive the series. Afterall, this is the last book! Sadly, we were mistaken. I think it’s time for me to move on. I really don’t see myself wasting anymore time on her sub-standard book anymore. It was very upsetting. She made us wait for 2 years for this BS.

  18. @ruhi yes those names, not to mention having 3 kids itself is quite appalling. I felt the epilogue was unnecessary in its present form. Not only does it spoil the ending but it formally ends the story forever. In fact it was strategically quite stupid of the great lord to not comprehend his end coming. Why should he stick to his ground, even when Harry told him everything at the end? To Avenge Bellatrix – his fav lieutenant’s death? quite weak since his character is based on no remorse and cold logic. Given he gets angry beyond measure but his mental faculties would be corrupted to such an extent is BS. hahaha

    But well this is Rowlings tale and from the epilogue it’s clear she was in a hurry to firmly shut Potter behind her. Still it is difficult to discredit her for what you’ve already read on my blog. πŸ˜‰

    Yeah well, i’m just going to pass on the Ebooks lolz.

  19. @pallav, I don’t think Voldemort behaved like the way he did to avenge Bellatrix’s death. He couldn’t have really cared about her dying, except, he realized that he is the only one standing! How Harry manages to read Voldemort’s mind in this book, whereas in Book 6 there was no connection, is beyond my comprehension. Anyway, I tried reading my hardback today, and I almost fell asleep after 90 pages. Maybe it will be a little more tolerable sometime in the future πŸ˜›

    Passing in the ebooks is not that bad a thought. Haha.

  20. Guys… I got the instinct before the book was out that Harry won’t die. Although I hope it really badly that he dies in the end, but my feeling tell me the otherwise. Can you guys tell me where I can get the leaked version of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows? Perhaps I will read the fake one version before I read the original one.

  21. Pingback: Fond Memories with my Harry Potter (carpet) Book « Time and Again

  22. I’m still saying kinda wow ruhi. I guess I thought the book was better than that. Though it’s getting kinda muddied down in comments, I’m wondering a few things maybe you can help me here. Where does it say Grindelwald isn’t dead – I must have missed that little info nugget. And where’s the person who manages some magic later on, or did I miss that as well?

  23. Seraphella says:

    She pulled a Lucas and destroyed a great series. Instead of a Jar Jar we got a lame Harry Potter. Ive seen authors falter before on long series of books….but I’ve never seen one so thoroughly ruin a story before. The only thing redeemable about this book is that it’s flamable. Now…where’s my lighter?

  24. right ruhi. but where in this new book is Grindelwald not dead? I know he’s a big part of the story, but I thought we were seeing flashbacks. Harry’s visions were always of the young Grindelwald taking the elder wand from Gregorovich weren’t they

  25. second note sorry for double post: I got the schmancy deluxe edition. Best part is the cover which is the scene where HHR are on the dragon’s back escaping from Gringotts

  26. No Patrick. They were not flashbacks. The images in his mind was what Voldemort was up to at the present moment. Grindelwald wasn’t young in Harry’s memory. He was locked in that prison Nuremgard (sp?). LV comes to him for the Elder Wand and then kills him.

    Well many fans at the forum are of the opinion that Rowling never said explicitly that Grindelwald was dead. I don’t know. The quote above says so. What I’ll believe for now is that Grindelwald was alive all the time, until LV killed him in the prison cell.

    Yes, I saw the cover on the net πŸ™‚ Looks very pretty. How are the other illustrations in the book? Are they worth the $$$? I have never bought a Deluxe Edition, though I would love to.

  27. YoYoMa says:

    Well if you look at it Grindelwald was dead he was not himself anymore he was a old worn out beat up old man who couldn’t probably muster a simple magic trick with a deck of cards…AND I liked this book I thought it was the best…I didn’t really care about the plotholes I think they didn’t matter I cried when Doby Died it was sad…etc…

  28. yeah, ok I totally spaced out on that part; somehow I thought he was torturing Gregorovitch in Nuremgard and not Grindelwald; that’s depressing then. I will have to go re-read that part. No, we specifically heard from JKR that Grindelwald died in 1945. Maybe he took a bong hit of sorcerer’s stone bud or something.

  29. oh. the illustrations are the ones at the start of each chapter, only larger and with captions. borderline lame, but puts each in context. plus there’s a single full-color portrait opposite the title page, and the inside cover is the same as the regular edition cover

  30. @Patrick, I am kind of re-reading the book 😐 I’m really appreciating some of the points now. Many things escaped my notice during the first read. I will probably re-read the series too. What about you?

  31. Mostly Harmless says:

    I came across this page accidentally while searching for something on google. It was explicit very early on that there are several inconsistencies and innacuracies in what appears to be the pathetic rant of an illiterate moron.

    The sole thing ‘hurting’ anyone’s ‘intelligence’ is the terrible phrasing and literary style of this utter piece of crap. To begin with, the phrase is ‘an insult to my intelligence’ but i shall refrain from being too pedantic and not comment further on your choice to use simpler, less grammatically correct, words.

    Futhermore, you speak of various plot holes, yet your argument appears to lack substance as you fail to point out any of these and back up your point with any feasible evidence.

    Ignoring your petty attempts at low rate sarcasm, i will move on. You criticise this woman’s writing, so go on, why don’t YOU write a novel then? Write a book, get it published and make it a multimillion pound bestseller. No, not some half-ass fan fiction which rips off her plots, your own. See if you get thousands of sleepy kids waiting in line for YOUR ‘epic’.

    Your response to this will probably be ‘but i never said i was an author’. Well, neither did JK Rowling before THOUSANDS OF MILLIONS OF CHILDEREN, ADULTS AND TEENAGERS AROUND THE WORLD BOUGHT AND READ AND RAVED ABOUT HER PUBLISHED BOOK. But she tried, and clearly succeeded. Your opinion is irrelevant.

    You know WHY it’s an epic? Of course you don’t, your IQ rivals that of an Amoeba (look it up). So i’ll explain. Because even though you didnt like it- you feel compelled to rant and talk about it. It’s THAT important to you. Surely if it’s worth you wasting your WISE words and evidently PRECIOUS time on (when you could be out getting a husband and starting your beautiful family) then it is an epic. Any publicity is good publicity. Secondly, have you heard of any other book which had an opening like this?! Probably not, most illiterates don’t know many book names. Alas, i pity you. But trust me, there hasn’t been. And if there has, not for a long long while. THIS MAKES IT AN EPIC.

    Moron.

  32. @Mostly Harmless,

    Never asked you to read my post, did I? This is my blog that you are coming to by the way. You don’t go to a guest’s house and call him moron, do you? And I do know what an Amoeba is. What’s your education level, may I ask? High School diploma?

    Before accusing me of not pointing out any plot holes, go and read my other posts and the links that I have provided. I pointed out around 250 plot holes, if not less!

    How many books have you read if you call this book an epic? I really doubt it. Why don’t you check out some of my favorite books from the “About” Page.

    I won’t tolerate some person like you coming to my blog and hurling abuses without knowing anything about me or taking the pain to read other posts.

    I’m not deleting your comment because it will provide entertainment to other readers. But do it one more time, and you won’t find your comment on this page, even after spending 30 mins on typing a measly 10 lines.

  33. Gawdd,, So much hate lol.. why don’t you all stop acting so dissapointed with “albus severus” and stuff and stop acting like Harry potter was yours to decide the end to, I read harry potter in two days flat because in my opinian, it was the best book i have ever read, the ending, so sad yet so happy, and I just think it was the perfect way to end it.. Especially the part with the sybolism with King’s cross, The pensieve and discovering the truth about Snape, and Seeing Harry’s parents, Lupin, and Sirius again from the ressurection stone, so sweet! I loved it, and plus, two more movies to come.. so yay!
    Well done J.k, you’ve done an amazingly brilliant job, not like i’m suprised!! πŸ˜€

  34. And yeh lol.. I accually agree that this books IS an epic, it left an imprint in my heart and I think It all tied together, effortlessly, with amazing, gripping imagination and charachters, no wonder Joanne Rowling is so(deservingly)successful, :D:D! Emilyy x

  35. @Wairavan, Thank you for your support πŸ™‚ We come across all kinds of people.

    @Emily, Glad that you enjoyed the book! I’m on my second read now, and am understand the subtle details much better. I don’t know if it’s an epic or not, but yes, it was a pleasant read, as long as I ignore some plot holes πŸ™‚ I wrote this post when I was very angry (bad move!). I’m really looking forward to the two movies too… and the theme park in Orlando! Yay!

  36. @pallav, yeah the theme park should be fun πŸ™‚ Who cares about Danielle being an adult? Saw him in Equus?! πŸ˜› Btw, I like Rupert Grint better. He is so down to earth and very humble. Looks decent too.

  37. @Patrick, I agree, I love that hair color πŸ™‚ It looks so pretty somehow. I don’t like blondes too much to tell you the truth.

    @Pallav, You saw Equus? The play I mean? Wow. You are one lucky stud. I wish I could see Danielle exposing his booties πŸ˜‰

  38. Mostly Harmless says:

    hahaha, how old do you think i am?! i don’t care if you delete it, go ahead. i didn’t read any other posts because if they were all going to declare death to the author then frankly i can’t be bothered. What angered me about your post was not your expression of dislike for the post, was just that you kept insulting her as if you had the right to! You did’t even acknowlege her achievement, which is what makes it a weak argument, it is unfair. You have a right to dislike the book obviously, but not to ruin it for others who enjoyed it so much. I’m glad to see you’re appreciating it more the second time round, i just think that you were abit quick to judge a woman who has spent years making so many childeren happy and excitable.

  39. @Mostlyharmless, Sure I did. I also expressly stated that you should read it at your own discretion. On second thoughts, your second comment seems to be more civilized that your first one. Good to see that you are behaving like someone of your own age group…whatever that might be…though I’m hoping that’s not 16-18.

  40. KA1 says:

    Good on you, mostly harmless.
    Ruhi, you’re angry rant just MAKES people want to respond in a similar way, don’t you see? If anything, Mostly harmless responded in a much calmer way than you wrote. Of course he/she was going to read something titled ‘I Hate you, Rowling.’ You can’t get angry at him/her for being angry, try putting yourself in their shoes, if you read an article like yours about a book you felt connected to, im sure you would also be pretty pissy. Especially considering the temper you have revealed in the article above!

    And you CANNOT compare a blog to coming into your house. Anything you post on the internet you write with the intention of people seeing. You dont leave the door to your home wide open with a welcome sign do you? I think not.

  41. Mostly Harmless says:

    Thank you, KA1, your point about the blogs is spot on! And such is the reason i felt free to comment!

    You may have expressed that however – and KA1 took the words right out of my mouth – when you title it so, you cannot expect people who have a great affection towards JK Rowling to not want to read the article to find a legitimate reason as to why she appears to be the essence of one’s antipathy. So i did, and i was disappointed to see that it seemed to be a mere repetition of your hatred!

  42. I was quite disappointed with the book too… It was like, what the hell waas happening? Half of the book was boring, and the remaining half… no comments. I agree with someone who said that the epilogue was a bollywood-ish ending. How can he live happily when he has all that as memories? and why GINNY?!

  43. Katya says:

    I know this is well after the fact, but this is one of the saddest blog posts I’ve ever read. I mean, I’m not thrilled with the Epilogue either, and the fact that G-Wald comes back to life is annoying, but this kind of vitriol is just… bizarre!

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